Sunday 1st February 2009

I have come to have learnt over the past 10 years of suffering from infertility that grieving is as natural as eating. I have spent a life time grieving for the children I haven’t got, and at times when I look at the children in my family and friends with their babies I feel a physical stabbing pain in my heart. The motherly instinct is a very real and powerful emotion. So when it is not fulfilled you feel bitterness, robbed, worthlessness, incomplete, denied and worst of all a complete failure, and over the years you seem to spend all your time moving backwards and forwards through these different stages. I have also learnt that you have to mourn your ghost babies that couple like us have. So I want to take this moment to think about all the couple that are in the same situation as Ross and I and pray for that miracle to be delivered to us all. HERES HOPING.